Hello everyone, AED (#aed_traveler). I am Japanese but I stopped speaking Japanese one month ago. Many people have come to ask why, so today I would like to describe the reason and the result of my language skills.
And I can not speak English fluently. The grammar is awful even if I don’t remember the messy words, or the English is terrible. (now too) But I still live in English, and recently I started to speak a little Finnish. I think this experience will be helpful for those who study language. (Especially conversation)
I really didn’t want to speak English on May 3, 2019, 85 days ago.
- 1 Reasons for talking in English
- 2 How did I get to live English?
- 3 as a result
- 3.1 good thing
- 3.2 Bad thing
Reasons for talking in English
I quit speaking Japanese because of negative reasons
I needed to speak English (for studying abroad)
I decided to study abroad three months ago leaving Japan, so that was right after that. There was a need to speak English, but an environment where I was busy at work and could not study was causing me to be irritated.
There was no Japanese counterpart
I was not able to become familiar with Japanese society at the age of five, and not only I could not make friends, but I also got along with my family. What I would like to make friends was always on the surface.
Speaking exactly the same conversation no matter who you talk to
I think that you will come to know that you will be able to speak Japanese, the Japanese people are surprisingly similar in conversation. At least it looked like that to me. In order not to talk about a life that spends lightly, people tend to naturally avoid their future goals and what to do towards them. And when you look at those who make such efforts, they almost give up on the surface that they are “wow”. But they always complain “I want to quit my job now.” “It’s hard to do my job.” They are not trying to change themselves at all. I was always annoyed when talking with them.
Being serviced and tired of speaking Japanese
Because I was talking to a male customer in the service business, I also received sexual harassment well. Any girl who comes to such a place is fine by that customer. But my job was to please them, so I was always acting to please them.
I lose confidence when we talk & I remember bad thing
As I said earlier, Japanese is a very vague and unclear language. And I only look at the other person without my own opinion. In Japan, because I need to be in harmony with my surroundings, I really want to go through my life, and I really didn’t match Japanese cultural thinking. When I spoke that language, I gradually became self-confident, and I was able to think that “I can not do something like this, I can not do it”. And every time I lose my confidence I always remember the bad things of the past. The hardest time is when I remember that my father said “You have failed.” Even if I forgot the past, I always remembered and hurt myself.
I broke up with my exboyfriend
Ours relationship is for two and a half years and six years after talking. I always talked to him because I had no friends and I had a bad relationship with my family, so I couldn’t make friends in Tokyo. He saw my negative part more than anyone else, and was told that I could only see my sister, and I said goodbye from me to escape from that fact. I loved it, but for each other. It is because even if we associate as it is, each other will only get hurt. But at that time no one can speak around me. I am not good at speaking to Japanese people, but I was in a halfway state that I can not speak English.
How did I get to live English?
younow: I want to talk to someone
For various reasons, I decided to abandon Japanese and speak English. I especially thought so when I was listening to the broadcast on a Japanese broadcast site. As usual, I was annoyed by hearing a story that seemed to be Japanese, and I immediately erased it. At that time, I realized that I really disliked Japanese. I searched another broadcast in English and younow appeared at the top, so I started broadcasting. The English in the comments were slang only and I often didn’t really understand, but I knew only the phrases “I don ‘understand” and “Do you mean it?” Thanks to these, I was able to raise my hearing and speaking ability significantly. Thank you everyone who really came to the broadcast.
blog: Japanese blogs do not run
I could write a blog in Japanese at that time. However, when I tried to write sentences in Japanese, I was always annoyed and took hours to write for hours. At this time, I also decided to make the blog English. Then I started to write Japanese text very quickly. Because, in order to translate into English, it is first necessary to make the Japanese text simple. After that, I put it in the google translation and correct the text somehow. It is very troublesome compared to Japanese blogs. Conversely, if there are many steps, I can feel that I am writing a blog. The wonderful thing is that people in different countries can see if it is English, so we could get access results soon. I remember writing for half a year in Japanese and I was very impressed to get a comment in less than a month though it was just one comment. And once I got used to it, these tasks weren’t too hard. This has greatly improved my writing and reading skills.
youtube: I want to record study abroad
I wanted to take a video to study abroad, but I also started to speak English because I was not in the mood to give a video in Japanese. This is how I practice to speak English cleanly in a single breath. I have not yet been able to show a video that speaks in English while capturing my face. I always take another sound after composing the video. Of course I’ve seen and corrected Google Translation. I practice a couple of times, but I’m tired and half-baked with the current video. I am really sorry, but please be patient until my English gets better.
SNS: I want to leave a note
In order to become English thinking on a daily basis, it was necessary to also post the usual SNS in English. It will also bring you thinking in English. Moreover, SNS is written in short English, so it is much easier than blogs and youtube, so it took less time to get used to it.
as a result
I could have my own intention
This was a great pleasure, as it is difficult to say Japanese with my own opinion. I was able to start running to my goal with this.
The spirit has come to settle down
I was always annoyed when I spoke in Japanese. It is probably not only the sound of Japanese, but I think now that Japanese harmonious culture has made me annoyed. Although I was born in Japan, I have never talked with people outside of Japan more than talking with Japanese, so my thinking was certainly not more than half in Japan.
I became able to live abroad alone
Loneliness made me stronger. I lost my mind alone. Because I can speak English to someone on the road when I can speak English, I was able to realize that I could live enough.
I was able to work
This may not have a direct bearing, but as a result, thanks to this action, I was unemployed when I came to Finland, but I could find a job. It is the result of the action.
English has been improved
I realize that I am improving day by day without being conscious of it if I am immersed in English life. Moreover, Finnish classes are written in English and notes are basically in English. Being able to develop English while in Finland is a very good environment for me.
Finish also started to speak little by little
It’s still about introduction and greetings, and I can not do without Google translation, but I just came to study abroad and understood in 3 weeks. Thanks to a lot of homework of the school teacher. That would be true if you studied 5 hours every day.
I have something to think in Japanese
After all, I can not come to English living environment suddenly, and sometimes I want to return to Japanese again without thinking. At that time, I try to read Japanese books without undue effort.
I can not talk deep
This is a bit of a problem. I often have a bad mentality, so it is often difficult to talk with other people about what I am doing.
Today is over.
Were there any useful information?
I would like to write the following article in Finland leisurely, hoping that Japan will become a more diverse country. see you.